Years ago, while planning a vacation with a good friend, she had one stipulation: “anyplace but the beach.”
“It’s the sand,” she said. “I like the ocean, but the sand gets into everything. Your shoes, your clothes, your hair.” She paused. “Your food.”
We never took that trip. It’s not a vacation for me if there’s no sand.
Every so often, someone asks why I always vacation at the beach. Last week, after talking about my Tenerife research and my search for a hot sand beach deal for the holidays, a colleague asked, “Why does it have to be the beach?”
“Because I have limited vacation time and limited resources,” I told her. “So I spend both doing something I enjoy. Going to the beach. Mostly in the Caribbean.”
After she walked away, a volunteer who was sitting next to us at the registration desk asked how long I’d been planning conferences.
“Twenty-four years,” I replied.
“Did you know the type of work you do influences your vacation choices?” she asked.
And that, dear reader, is how I fell down the rabbit hole that inspired this week’s newsletter.
The Brain Bent
My curiosity led me to Dr. Arlene R. Taylor, an author and brain-function educator who developed a framework she calls Brain Bent. Her theory is that we have preferred ways of thinking and processing information, which may influence the activities we enjoy and those we find exhausting.
Taylor makes an interesting distinction between what we’re good at and what comes naturally. We can become highly skilled at something through years of practice or necessity, even when it requires more mental energy than activities we’re naturally drawn to. In other words, just because we’re good at something doesn’t mean it’s how we prefer to spend our time or energy.
She identifies four preferences: Envisioning, Prioritizing, Maintaining, and Harmonizing. To put them in vacation terms, the Envisioner is drawn to new places and experiences. The Prioritizer enjoys researching destinations, comparing options, and organizing the details of a trip. The Maintainer is happy returning to a favorite place. And the Harmonizer cares most about who’s coming and whether everyone is having a good time. That’s my niece.
Based on Dr. Taylor’s descriptions, at work and at home, I am a Prioritizer. Every day, I’m thinking, researching, solving problems, analyzing risks, managing timelines, schedules, and people, and keeping track of hundreds of logistical details. I’m good at it. Some would say it’s my niche. But according to Taylor, it isn’t my bent. When it comes to vacation, I am 100% a Maintainer.
The Pleasure of Doing Very Little
I have no problem spending an entire day on the beach doing very little. I also don’t mind returning to the same beaches, or even the same hotels. I know what to expect. I know what I enjoy. That goes for trips outside my usual beach orbit, too.
Take my Paris workcation in 2024, for example. I had spent a week executing a conference in the city, and tacked on an extra three days at the end to do some sightseeing because on my first trip to Paris, before the pandemic, I saw almost nothing.
This time, I did some sightseeing. It was a few weeks before the Olympics, so I also watched the city prepare for the Games. But I spent a good portion of those three days in my room at the Paris Marriott Opera Ambassador, wrapped in a hotel robe, drinking champagne and eating macarons and KFC.
Paris has taught me that even when I’m nowhere near a beach, I still enjoy doing very little on vacation. So maybe there’s something to Taylor’s theory. Or maybe I just like the beach.
The Sound of the Ocean
One year, I was so busy with work that I didn’t have time to take a vacation. I missed the ocean so much that I bought one of those sound machines that plays beach sounds.
Two weeks later, a client asked if I could go to Sesimbra, Portugal, for a hotel site inspection. Sesimbra is a lovely seaside town less than an hour from Lisbon, and one I’d recommend to anyone visiting Portugal. It doesn’t seem to get nearly as much attention as Cascais.
I arrived before my hotel room was ready, so I went down to Praia da Califórnia, the beach across the street from the hotel, to wait.
That night, I slept with my balcony door open, listening to the sound of an actual ocean. Just two weeks earlier, I’d bought a machine to recreate those very sounds. Now here I was, listening to the real thing.
I couldn’t believe how fortunate I was. Yes, I was there for work, and the ocean was far too cold for bathing. But I was at the beach.
That trip was one of the experiences that inspired me to create The Hammock Society. As long as my vacation time and resources are limited, I’ll continue choosing the beach first. Preferably one with warm water and hot sand.
And if you feel the same way, don’t let anyone guilt you into touring the pyramids in Egypt when all you want to do is veg out at an all-inclusive hotel in Montego Bay.
You can tell them that your brain has a bent, so you’re only doing what comes naturally.
Who are you on vacation? Are you a Maintainer, an Envisioner, a Prioritizer, or a Harmonizer? Comment below!
The Ultimate Maintainer Escape
Of all my beach vacations, my 2019 trip to Tamarindo, Costa Rica, might have been the ultimate Maintainer escape. It didn’t start that way. When I checked into Hotel Capitán Suizo, I booked a slate of activities through the concierge. The first was a snorkeling trip that lasted five hours, four of them on the boat. When I got back, I canceled everything except my spa treatments.
I dug this story out of the archives to share here. When I first published it during the pandemic, a friend booked a stay as soon as Costa Rica reopened. She loved it so much that she talked another friend into going, too. Read my full post below.
Pura Vida in Costa Rica
I sat at the poolside bar enjoying my welcome drink and the infamous Tamarindo Beach sunset. On the beach, a couple was exchanging wedding vows, a young boy was bathing in the surf under the watchful gaze of his mother, and a group of local men was decompressing from the day’s work -